Nicole - To the UK for sex

There has been much comment on the number of Poles coming to the UK to work, well with BABES like Nicole coming over in droves, I say ship all our scumbags over there, rename Britain as "New Poland" and offer all Polish babes between the ages of 18 and 35 £1000 each to come and re-settle in London, preferably next to me! I mean, just feast your eyes on the lovely Nicole, it was like wrestling with a wriggly octopus in a red dress. The thing is, these girls just like men, all men, big, small, fat, thin. Suggest girl-girl fun and they just scoff, "Why do I want to prod other girl when there is man with stiff dick for the fucking?" Well what can you say to that, except "Why indeed?" BY THE WAY HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU OUT THERE!!!

Victoria Brown - Smoking with her pussy

Here is the fabulous Victoria Brown, sex maniac and bum-fun queen! Starting with a touch of fisting and bum-hole stretching to get me in the mood! She then moved on to smoking one her Capstan Navy Cut cigarettes from her pussy. She said this was in place of giving up smoking! I'd love to see her having a fag after a good meal in a restaurant! What with all this and a pair of GIANT JUGGS I was in Heaven.

Isabel - 500 Pound hairy UK girl 2

Well I must admit seeing, "The Munch Bunch" (Lara & Isabel) in action turned me on and I couldn't wait to hand the camera to Lara and get my cock jammed into the lovely Isabel. The various veg had opened up her holes and it was really easy to squeeze my dick in. Her pussy and arse tasted of fresh cucumber with just a hint of courgette! Anyway we had a fuck-fest including DP with a vibrator and she actually came 3 times, which was amazing feeling her body grip my dick and then judder.............that was horny!

Keeley - 500 pound Nut-ball challenge

In this country as soon as you get a camera out in public, they come out of the woodwork. Yobs, knife-wielding hoodies, loud mouthed van drivers, all attempting to at worst, kill you and at best ruin your sound. Another type is the curious "Nut-ball", who is just desperate to get on TV. Well Keeley, appeared in my shot and was possibly the ugliest girl I'd ever scene. She seemed a little deranged, but that didn't stop me from negotiating a price for some fun, you know me, "Anything with a pulse". Anyway, I was stunned, when she transformed in to a tiny denim-shorts clad sex crazed babe, who liked it up the arse as well!! Call me old fashioned but I just love little denim shorts and you couldn't have got smaller than Keeley's, it was lovely plunging my hand down the front anyway check it for yourself.

Lara Latex - The pimp from hell part 2

Well sure enough, just as Robyn has satisfied her wanton, lesbian lust on the hapless Lara, she sends for her "Business associate" Dave. A hulking great thug, who burst into the room, threatening yours truly, until Robyn reassures him that I'm "Kosher". Anyway, what a double act of sleazebags, Robyn and Dave's banter was hilarious, especially when he complained to Robyn that she'd stuck him with a lady-boy on his last assignment. So now it's Dave's turn to put Lara through her paces with a hard shag, I must admit this was the strangest interview I'd ever attended, I mean you wouldn't see this on the "Apprentice". When it got to, as Robyn so delicately put it, "Dropping anchor in Poo Bay" Lara backed off, so Robyn showed her how, with Dave pounding into her arse hole while Lara helped. Needless to say Lara passed their audition and it's a ...

Lara Latex - 500 Pound hairy UK girl

Well I'd heard through the grapevine about Isabel Ice's fondness for "Fruit 'N' Veg so I thought I'd try one of my challenges on her. Well it wasn't really a "Challenge" I suppose, since she'd already been eyeing up the local grocer's shop. Anyway what a scene, it was like, "The Munch Bunch" on crack! Vegetables being shoved in every hole, (Organic, I should point out) Even ATM with a cucumber. Well it was so horny that at the end, the veg's were so covered in juice that I decided to dice them and make a stir fry of my own recipe, "Bum-juice Legumes Fricassee a la Isabel" It was absulutely delightful with a glass of Chianti. Please contact me if you want the complete recipe, you can try making it with your own girlfriend for a romantic slap-up dinner for two!